Stumpy’s Burger Off Entry

[Editor's note: This should've been published yesterday. Sorry about that.]

So I was a participant of one of those famous Poultney Cook Offs, the Burger Off. Below is the recipe I entered, a Fajita Burger. It didn’t win, but people liked it! — NOW GET COOKING!

Ingredients

  • 1 1/4 pound ground beef
  • 1 tablespoon olive oil
  • 1 small red onion, chopped
  • 1 small bell pepper, chopped
  • 1 garlic clove, minced
  • 1 tablespoon lime juice
  • 1 teaspoon chili powder
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 4 flour tortillas
  • 1 cup salsa
  • Guacamole

Directions

Prepare a hot fire in a grill.

While that’s warming, heat oil in a large skillet. Add onion and red pepper and cook over medium heat, stirring often, until vegetables are lightly browned (about 4 minutes). Add garlic and cook for an additional minute. Remove from heat and let cool slightly.

In medium bowl, combine cooked vegetables, ground beef, lime juice, chili powder and salt. Using wet hands, form into 4 oval patties about 2 inches wide and 4 1/2 inches long.

Place patties in center of oiled grill, cook, turning once, until browned (about 4 minutes). Transfer burgers to outside edge of grill and continue grilling, turning once, until burgers are cooked through and meat springs back when pressed lightly with a finger (8 to 10 minutes).

Meanwhile, wrap tortillas in aluminum foil and place on sides of grill to heat through. Now place warm tortillas and bowls of salsa and guacamole on table. Let each guest place a burger on a tortilla, top with salsa and guacamole, roll up and enjoy.

Of Motels, McDonalds, and Mothers from West Virgina

From Ann Patchett’s My Life In Sales: “While I was out with my last novel, Run, I routinely had audiences of 200 people a night. As those patient readers stood in line and waited for me to sign their books, I realized for the first time that book tour really is more than a goodwill gesture. It’s about selling books.”

The Burger Off

Obligatory Introductory Paragraph

Some of you may remember that, up here in the Poultney village, we like to do a little thing called a Cook Off. It’s basically Iron Chef style rules, where there’s one main ingredient/kind-of-food and the rest is up to the chefs. We’ve been doing this thing for…jeez…three years, I guess. It started with a Soup Off, and since then, we’ve had a Pie Off, a Kabob Off, a Salsa Off, another Salsa Off, a Noodle Off, a Cocktail & Sandwich Off, a Loaf Off, a Maple Off, and this past weekend, we added the Burger Off.

Actual Introduction

Well, it’s official. Those of us participating in the Cook Offs are old. It was bound to happen at some point, but years from now, when we look back for that moment when we should’ve started looking for the Reaper, the Burger Off just may be it. Because the Burger Off marked the first time we had an entire new generation of human beings in attendance.

Which is to say the Burger Off had babies like whoa!

Read More

NY Times Rejects McCain Op-Ed

From the Drudge Report’s DRUDGE REPORT FLASH 2008®: “An editorial written by Republican presidential hopeful McCain has been rejected by the NEW YORK TIMES — less than a week after the paper published an essay written by Obama… [The Times' Op-Ed editor said] ‘The Obama piece worked for me because it offered new information; while Senator Obama discussed Senator McCain, he also went into detail about his own plans. It would be terrific to have an article from Senator McCain that mirrors Senator Obama’s piece. To that end, the article would have to articulate, in concrete terms, how Senator McCain defines victory in Iraq.” [Drudge's article also contains the rejected Op-Ed piece]

Mom & Dad Are Out “Saving The World” Again

From Nicholas Kristof’s Geezers Doing Good: “Some 78 million American baby boomers are now beginning to retire, and one survey this year by a research institute found that half of boomers are interested in starting…new careers with a positive social impact. If we boomers decide to use our retirement to change the world, rather than our golf game, our dodderdom will have consequences for society every bit as profound as our youth did.”

Interesting Stuff For Dorks Like Me

From the University of Nottingham’s The Periodic Table of Videos: “Tables charting the chemical elements have been around since the 19th century - but this modern version has a short video about each one.”

Maybe the best hook I’ve ever seen in a news article

From the Guardian’s Last year I killed a man: “At 9.45am on Saturday, June 23 2007, I killed a man. A perfectly ordinary man, on a perfectly ordinary summer’s day.”

In Anticipation of Tomorrow’s Burger Off

From Here’s Cooking At You Kid’s Thai won on Build a Better Burger Contest: “Karen’s delicious blending of the two worlds of American grill classics and Thai cuisine turned taste buds in Napa valley and captured the $50,000 Grand Prize yesterday in Sutter Home Winery’s annual Build a Better Burger Contest.” [Hat tip to Amber for the link]

How To Be An Artist

From Cary Tennis’s latest advice in his regular column Since You Asked: “The answer, as always, for an artist, is to pick something and get to work. If you have a piece of marble ready to work on in the basement, and you have your tools, then go to the basement and start working on the sculpture. If you are sitting at a desk and you have paper in front of you, start writing. If you have tubes of acrylic paint in your taboret, and there is good light, and you have a canvas stretched on your easel, then paint.”

Crying in their mugs of piss

From Salon’s The rise and fall of an American beer: “Ever since Budweiser was sold to Belgian brewing monster InBev on Sunday, beer drinkers have been sighing that a piece of Americana has been lost. They’ve got it all wrong. During its rise to President for Life of Beers, Budweiser ended up crushing dozens of local brands that formed part of this country’s colorful drinking heritage.”

Copyright © 2007 Fluid Imagination. All rights reserved.